Misc. Links

  • Gen Fiction
  • Adult Fiction
  • Slash Fiction
  • Fic Links

HFS
Fanfic page with pictures, music, previews, staff bios and episode listings, all you could want, and more, for Highlander fiction fans. HFS season one is finished, we have a total of 23 episodes, and they're all available if you follow the HFS link.

They Shoot Fanfic Writers Don't They? - by Angela Mull

Disclaimers: "Highlander" and its characters are the property of Rysher Entertainment and are used without permission.
FBI Agents Mulder and Scully belong to Chris Carter, 1013 Productions and Fox Television Broadcasting. These "X-Files" characters are borrowed without permission for fun, not profit.
Lisa Krakowka is borrowed without permission, although I don't think she'll mind. Sandra McDonald's disembodied voice also borrowed without permission.
 

Part 4/4

Fifteen minutes later they were headed out of the airport. Duncan had picked up his luggage and asked baggage personnel if they could store it for him until the next day. He hoped they would be able to off Kenny by the end of the night.

None of the Immortals knew exactly how they would find Kenny. Chicago was a rather large place, after all. But plenty of daylight remained, and it was worth a try.

They'd just exited the airport into the chill air when the Buzz hit them. They stopped and began searching through the crowd for its source, wind whipping gently at their clothing. Methos spotted the Immortal first.

"Bloody hell," he said under his breath.

Richie and Duncan heard him and turned to see who he was looking at. Their mouths opened in shock as they saw Kenny standing just 10 feet away. The snot-nosed child Immortal shifted nervously from one foot to another.

"Look, I'm just here to get something I left behind," he said. "I didn't come for any of you."

"Well that's just too bad, isn't it?" Richie sneered and took a step forward. "Because we have some unfinished business to take care of."

Kenny backed up a few steps and held out his hands in a staying gesture. "Wait, Richie. Just hear me out, OK? I came back for one thing, and then I'm leaving."

"You're not leaving," Duncan said.

"Why not? Are you going to kill me?" Kenny asked defiantly.

Duncan nodded.

"You can't," Kenny said, using his best puppy-dog expression. "It wouldn't be honorable. I'm just a kid. And I haven't challenged you."

"Doesn't matter," Richie said, moving nearer Kenny so they stood just two feet apart. "One way or another, we're going to whack off your annoying little head."

"But I'm just a child."

"But the fans want you dead," Methos said in a detached voice. "And we try to oblige the fans when we can."

"Please, I just want to get my bear and leave," Kenny said, his eyes filling with tears.

"Your bear?" Duncan asked, puzzlement showing on his face.

"Yeah, my bear. My teddy bear."

"You've got to be kidding," Richie said, laughing. "You came back here just to get some stupid stuffed animal?"

"Mr. Snuggles isn't stupid!" Kenny yelled. "I've had him for 200 years. He's my friend. I just want Mr. Snuggles."

With that, Kenny sat down and started sucking his thumb, much to the amazement of Duncan, Richie and Methos.

"This can't be for real," Richie said, turning back around to face his friends. "This has to be a trick."

"Maybe not," Duncan said, sadness crossing his features.

"How can you possible believe his act?" Methos asked incredulously, hands on his skinny hips.

"Because it reminds me of something -- "

"I thought you couldn't have any flashbacks."

"That's what I thought," Duncan said in wonder. "But now I remember..."

***

1604

"Now ye listen to me, boy, ye cannot have the doll. Ye are too old for it," said Angus MacLeod to his son.

Duncan sat curled up on his bed, the ragged doll his mother had made clenched between his dirty hands. He knew that his father was right; at 12 years old, he shouldn't have the doll. But it made him feel safe when his mother wasn't around. And it seemed like he had fewer nightmares when he slept with it.

"Please, father, let me keep it. I'll not be bad at all if ye let me keep it," Duncan pleaded, but his father shook his head and leaned over him. Angus wrested the doll away from his son and crossed the room to the fireplace, then threw the doll into the flames.

"No, no, father," Duncan cried, and ran to try and rescue his doll. His father's strong grip prevented him, and he could only watch the flames curl up and char the cloth. "I want my dolly, I want my dolly..."

***

When Duncan's flashback stopped, he looked sheepishly at Richie and Methos. Richie's face was a mixture of horror and disgust. Methos' was, as usual, unreadable.

"Oh, Mac," Richie said, shaking his head. "A doll? You got that goofy over a doll?"

"I don't want to talk about it," Duncan said petulantly. "And while we're at it, Richie, tell that fanfic writer that I'd rather have no flashbacks than those kinds of flashbacks."

"Aw, what's the matter, Mac," Richie said in a patronizing tone, patting Duncan on the head. "Would Macky-Wacky feel all better if I bought him a dolly-wolly?"

Duncan swatted Richie's hand away and glared at him. "Knock it off, Richie. We have more important things to think about, like what to do with Kenny."

"I still say we kill him," Methos said quietly, his eyes cold and calculating. "I don't need a reason, and I don't really care if he's a child or not. He could be teething and I wouldn't care."

"I thought you might feel that way," Kenny said, standing up and withdrawing a gun from underneath his jean jacket. Nearby pedestrians screamed and scattered into the street. "But I thought the waterworks were worth a try." He raised the gun and aimed it at Methos.

Richie had anticipated Kenny's sudden change of heart and pivoted around, stepped up to Kenny and knocked the gun up so it fired into the air. He then threw a vicious punch that landed with a satisfying crack on Kenny's jaw, knocking the boy out.

"Richie, are you insane?" Duncan asked.

Richie looked at him in surprise. "What are you talking about?"

"That bullet is going to come down somewhere," Duncan said, and scanned the sky overhead. "Someone could get hurt."

Duncan, Richie and Methos all looked skyward, waiting. After a few minutes passed, they started playing rock, paper, scissors. A loud ping interrupted; the bullet had hit a nearby luggage cart.

"Hey," Richie said, pointing at the cart. "If we hurry, we can haul Kenny off on that before the cops come running -- "

"Too late," Methos said, smirking.

Two officers ran up to the trio and began asking questions. Duncan told them that Kenny had tried to rob and then shoot them, but Richie had saved the day. Richie smiled at that. Only in fanfic did he get credit for saving the day.

<<You're welcome.>>

"So if you're feeling that generous, does that mean I can have sex now?"

<<Nope.>>

"Sadist," Richie muttered as the cops handcuffed Kenny and led him away.

***

"I feel cheated," Methos said petulantly, slumped in a chair at their departure gate.

Duncan patted the eldest Immortal on the shoulder consolingly. "Don't feel bad, Methos. We tried to get Kenny. It just wasn't the right time. The fans will have to wait."

"But what if they think we're failures? What if they don't like us as much?"

"You're just worried they won't give you anymore of those hard-core sex scenes," Richie said sarcastically.

"Who are you to talk about a lack of sex?" Methos asked pointedly.

Richie crossed his arms as a voice announced the pre-boarding call for the Chicago to Miami flight. "Hey, at least I didn't get pulverized during this fanfic. I even got to be the hero. One day, she'll break down and let me have sex."

"I would have settled for a beer. Or whacking off that little urchin's head."

"At least Kenny's locked away somewhere where he can't sucker anymore Immortals into his traps," Richie observed, standing up as they called general boarding.

The three Immortals filed into line. None had first-class seats this time, an obvious oversight on the part of TPTB.

As the line inched forward, a familiar voice piped up from behind them.

"Well, well, Scully. It's our friends from Denver again."

Duncan, Richie and Methos turned around to confirm what their ears had already told them; the two FBI agents were in line behind them.

"Um, I thought you were busy with that beheading case," Richie said.

"Something more interesting came up," Mulder said, tossing a sunflower seed into his mouth.

"More interesting than people cutting off each other's heads and strange lightning strikes?" Duncan asked, slightly affronted.

Mulder nodded and spit out the sunflower seed shell. It landed in Scully's hair. Mulder picked it out and tossed it on the ground.

"There have been several fatal accidents reported in the Key West area where victims who were pronounced dead at the scene got up minutes later, apparently totally healed."

Richie coughed, Methos found something fascinating on the carpet to stare at and Duncan nodded, his face neutral.

"Interesting," Duncan said. "Well, good luck."

He turned around and headed down the walkway to the plane. Methos followed directly behind him, and Richie brought up the rear. Once they found their seats and settled in, Richie tapped Duncan on the arm.

"You don't think they'll find out the truth about us, do you?"

Duncan shrugged. "I don't know, Richie. Maybe. But that depends on whether or not the fanfic writer decides to do a sequel crossover story."

Richie rolled his eyes. "You just had to suggest it, Mac, didn't you?"

<<Ooh, good idea.>>

Richie glared at the ceiling. "Oh yeah, great idea. Just what we need is getting yanked into another fanfic by you and getting stuck with those weirdo FBI agents again. Well, I'm not going to do it. Not this time. Forget it. I'm not even going to talk to you."

<<What if I told you there might be something...extra...in it for you?>>

Richie grinned. "Well, if it's what I'm thinking, count me in."

The End

PREV

INDEX